Ladles and jelly-spoons, the next President of the United States: Dr. Don Allen. Er … how’s that again?

Allen, a Youngstown veterinarian known to viewers of the WKBN-TV (27) news for his weekly pet-talk segments, has decided to run for president after deciding that Americans had a “general dissatisfaction with our government.”

According to the Youngstown Vindicator, he wants to build a fence along the Mexican border; offer $1 billion to “whoever can find a way to make the United States independent of foreign oil within 10 years,” and replace all taxes with a flat 18 percent sales tax on everything except food and medicine.

The 60-year-old Illinois native, who’s had a practice in Youngstown for 15 years, is running as an independent and is sending petitions to veterinarians around the country asking them for help in getting on ballots in their states.

I’d say his campaign gives me paws, but that would be catty. Though Allen has an interesting tail to tell, he’s got a fur way to go before he’ll be able to collar the voters. He needs a rabid group of supporters first, and then, if he’s lucky, the national media will start sniffing around.

Sorry, I’ll stop now.